I have worked with clients who have been dealing with the repercussions of having secrets in their family. They have been living with the ‘family shame’ for many years. There are many secrets that revolve around abuse and other traumatic experiences. There are many incidents that are shrouded in secrecy. These unspoken incidents cause a lot of guilt and shame. These secrets stop people from living a productive and fulfilling life.
Here is a generic tapping script for dealing with family secrets and the shame.
Even though I am overwhelmed as there are too many secrets in my family, I love and respect myself.
EB- this overwhelming feeling
EC – there are too many secrets.
UE – I don’t know where to begin.
UN- All these secrets are holding me hostage.
Ch- I cannot break free.
CB- this overwhelm is stopping me from breaking free.
Take a deep breath and continue tapping
EB – I acknowledge and accept my feelings of overwhelm.
EC – I choose to do something about my feelings.
UE – I choose to release these feelings of overwhelm.
UN, Ch, CB, UA- I choose to release these feelings of overwhelm.
Pause. Take a deep breath. See how you feel in your body. If you have any tension, heaviness in chest, numbing sensations, headache, tightness in the abdomen etc, then first tap on them and then proceed.
EB- these family secrets make me ashamed
EC –UE – I feel ashamed of my family
UN – I feel ashamed of myself
Ch- I feel ashamed of my family history
CB- I have been keeping them inside me all these years
UA – Now, I am willing to release them.
Take a deep breath.
EB – I am willing to look at all this differently.
EC- Every family has their own history.
UE – My family also has it..
UN – Every person has their own share of secrets.
Ch- I too have them.
CB – I am willing to break free now.
UA – I choose to love and respect myself despite all the secrets.
Pause and reflect. How do you feel in your body?
Take a deep breath and tap
EB – I am willing to release this history of shame now.
UE- I am willing to release the shame.
UN – I choose to release the shame and break free from these destructive patterns.
Ch – I choose to break free from the shame.
CB- I choose to fully embrace who I am.
UA – I choose to respect myself.
Rate how you feel. Do you still feel the sensations in your body? Do you feel lighter? If not, try another 2-3 rounds.
One of my clients used the following to describe how she felt.
“There was too much garbage in my family history. “
So we tapped on –
Even though I am overwhelmed , there is too much garbage in my family history,…
Even though I am still overwhelmed by all this garbage, I choose to see it in another way. I want to accept that every family has there own garbage that has to be taken out.